My pen name is Anastassia Klara. Why don’t I use my real name you may be wondering? I am still working on building my career, and during this process, there is potential for invisible discrimination. There isn’t supposed to be discrimination but facing reality, it happens because there are employers with bias. In fairness, some of them may be oblivious that they even have their preference. Therefore, to protect myself from experiencing this disappointment and judgment of people in our society that are ignorant (out of no fault of their own), I created a pen name to maintain privacy.
My pen name symbolizes how my mind has felt stuck for a long time, and I am determined to work with my weaknesses and overcome my obstacles. Anastassia means “resurrection,” and Klara means “clear, pure, open and innocent” which illustrates my open communication.
The purpose of this blog is to relate to readers who struggle with ADHD, ADD or even those that have a desire to understand what goes on in an ADHD type. More specifically, I struggle with the combination type of inattentiveness, disorganization, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. There are a lot of resources out there that give us information on overcoming it. However, in my perspective, I don’t think it’s precise enough for our needs. Some resources are so floralized with so much positiveity where it feels it gives the message that it’s easy to embrace our weaknesses. Of course I believe we can overcome our obstacles; however, I think it is important to acknowledge that there are good days and bad days. There are days when I cry driving on my way home because I had a tough day managing my condition.
Besides coping with ADHD, my brain floods me with self-loathing, critical and negative intrusive thoughts. In my case, this does not happen all the time, but it comes in waves. I have always had high expectations for my success in my academics, career and my relationships. When I encounter significant setbacks and disappointments, these intrusive thoughts put a lot of pressure on my character which leads to feeling overwhelmed with emotion and panic. I am sure a lot of readers can relate to this struggle. Presently, I’m working with a fantastic therapist that is helping me dispute these harsh thoughts that come crashing.
On top of dealing with my mental health struggles, I also have Hashimoto’s. It is a massive pain in my life. I have been able to accomplish lowering my TPO antibodies numbers drastically with diet changes. Remember despite our media stating that we can adjust our diet to de-escalate symptoms with ADHD and even Hashimoto’s, it is NOT a cure-all.
Nothing is permanent. Taking care of ourselves is no different than taking care of our pets or plants. They need food, sun, water and nurturing. If those things are neglected, they wilt.
Trust me, I am a health freak and take self-care very seriously. Have tried various things to help my condition. I have to live with this my whole life. Depending on your genetics, medication may or may not help you. We should be open to all options that can help us with self-care.
As you can see, I deal with A LOT on a regular basis. My body and brain chemistry are incredibly high maintenance! Sigh…. These days, I’m trying to be grateful that my situation is not worse than it could be.
Currently, I’m doing a lot of work to help myself. My struggles are always going to be there. No matter how hard I try, they will never entirely disappear, so I have to work with what I have to fight back to give my life the meaning it deserves. I believe we all deserve to have a better life by working towards personal growth goals. I will share my journey with you and hope you can learn from it and maybe even apply it to your own life.
Join me in my daily mantra:
“DO NOT ACCEPT DIS-SATISFACTION. Give your life the respect and love it deserves.”